This series was written after a good friend passed away as a result of Type 1 diabetes. He passed in his sleep, unexpectedly, at 21.

Phone Call

The difference between “not accepting”
And “not understanding”
Began when Lucas called me back.

The worst of lessons that I have learned, in life
Is that there is a horrible distance
To climb
Between the two.

Nothing Rest

We all return to dirt in the end, I suppose.

Your rest
Is unremarkable and quiet tonight
Sickly mud is your heart’s symbiont

When they found you,
There was really nothing there.

Ask

You never woke up
Or at least, that is how I imagine it went
Now that you are gone
I cannot ask permission
To continue

In your absence.

I can only feel the ground beneath me
And ask forgiveness.

Black

A black hole is only “black”
Because it absorbs light.

Instead, there is nothing where you once were.

When I call now,
The emptiness will never call back.

Occasion

I had to buy a suit

A fashion statement,
So that I could carry your casket.

I don’t remember if it was only a dream
When the cashier asked me
“What’s the occasion?”
I said
“It’s for a friend.”

Meaning Left

As you lay down to sleep forever
Your father holds your hand in the casket
And I ask myself
If you have any meaning left

Who you became

Innocent earth drips from your ears
In your sleep
Your rest
Is remarkable and iridescent tonight

I am forced to wonder
Who you were when they found you

The same beautiful mind
Became a cocoon
Empty now

Beyond Horizon

At the horizon, in my mind
There is an infinite little space
Where I can reserve hope that there is no such thing, as no more.

I will look into it here and there
And think of where you’ve gone.

I shall look into the distance, now
Where earth, and skyline meet.
And forever know, that you are there.
Unmistakably
At peace.